Over Reacting?

Alam ko, long time no post and no blog hopping but well…time has not been on my side lately, so I am so very sorry. The real student life has now begun. Classes from 8:00 to 3:00, exam dito project doon, at super dami ng manuals na dapat pag-aralan kaya para na akong patay everytime I came home. I have to get up at 5:30 A.M, fix our lunchboxes, make breakfast, then get ready myself and Gillian. Off to Kindergarten at 7:15 A.M, tapos diretso na ako niyan papuntang school. Late afternoon, pagkatapos ng klase ko, I have to drive back home very quick to pick up the little bogoy. Pagdating ng bahay, di pa nga nakapagpahinga…kailangan ko ng maggayak ng hapunan. In between cooking, I check/reply my clients emails or make a project study and or working on client’s site…just like today. Wow what a stress! I know I have promised Tina na mag slow down ako, pero mukhang impossibleng mangyari ito sa ngayon. But at least kahit papaano, may desiplina na akong matulog ng maaga on weekdays. Di ko na kailangan pang pilitin na ipikit ang aking mga mata dahil half way tulog na ako habang kumakain.

Oh well anyway, I am only mentioning my activities and schedules lately para magkaroon ng idea ang ibang tao diyan how busy and tired I am at present. They seem not to believe me kasi kaya heto sinulat ko na para doble.

Okay, the first part of this entry is not relevant to the title, but worth mentioning (para sa akin). I have chosen the title “Over Reacting” with question mark. Dahil gusto kong malaman o marinig sa inyo kong nag over react nga ako? This is again related to the Kindergarten. You remember I posted about “The Tagesstaette” or day care, right? Hindi pa tapos ang problemang yon but we are planning to transfer Gillian to the Catholic Kindergarten. Nag inquire na kami pero yon nga lang, wala pang bakante, so kailangan na naman naming maghintay. Buti nalang in a couple of months pa mag take effect ang bagong schedule, so at least may time pa kaming maghanap ng solusyon.

Since nagsimula aking klase, nagbago din ang oras ng pasok ni Gillian sa Kindergarten. Alas nueve siya dati pumapasok, ngayon at 7:30 na. I know this very hard for the young boy because he has to get up very early in the morning and has to stay more than 8 hours in the Kindergarten. I felt guilty about this, and I felt sorry for him but this is not a long term situation (I reassure myself). Guilt feeling is eating me out everytime I see my tired boy falls asleep on his chair, just a few minutes after we arrived home. As if I’m not yet troubled enough with my own bad feelings, a trainee teacher in the Kindergarten keeps on bugging me with her complains about Gillian.

Such as:

  • I am wondering why Gillian is not eating. Other kids were teasing him if he knows how to eat at all or if he knows how to chew.
  • He’s not drinking too.
  • He don’t talk and if he talk it’s not clear. We are now beginning to have problems with him because he do not communicate with us.
  • It is obvious that long hours of stay here in Kindergarten is not good for him.

One and Two
Maiintindihan ko kong siya ay nag-aalala dahil ang bata ay hindi kumakain. Pero malinaw na nagkocomplain siya and not worried. Di ba’t trabaho niyang i-encouraged ang bata na kumain or uminom? We after all paid for her service. Alam kong mahirap pakainin ang batang ito at napakasilan pa, but then if her reaction is like para siyang nabubuwisit or napuno. Then she is not qualified for the job.

Three
Ano ba talaga? Di nagsasalita, nagsasalita pero mahirap intindihin and or ayaw makipagcommunicate sa kanila? Bago namin ipinasok si Gillian, sinabi na namin sa kanila na hindi pa masyadong marunong magsalita ang bata and when he speak, it is mix. They said: “Oh no problem, he will learn to speak here, with all other kids around.” Ngayon nasaan na ang kanilang pinakitang understanding? More than one month palang ang bata sa kanila ang dami na nilang reklamo. Sa dinami-dami ng aking mga anak-anakan at sariling anak na pinapasok sa Kindergarten, ngayon lang ako nakatagpo ng katulad nilang Kindergarten teachers na parang mga zombie. Emotionless, insensitive and unfriendly. Hindi ko ito sinabi dahil galit ako or whatever but it is the way how I find them. So if I could sense their coldness, ano pa kaya ang bata na mas matindi ang instinct. The kid is simply browbeaten by their overbearing manner, so no wonder if he is aloof and shy.

Four
Well, I know that too kaya di na kailangan pang sabihin sa akin ng paulit-ulit. Mabigat na nga sa kalooban ko, lalo pang idinidiin. I explained/told this broad the current situation and told her na opposite ang behaviour na pinapakita ng bata sa Kindergarten kaysa kong nasa bahay siya. I know I owed her no explanation and some paalala na may kasamang taas ng kilay pero mabuti na yong malaman niya. ‘tang ina niya!

Beng

Beng Hafner is my name. Well, most of you know that already. I am a mother of 3 and a granny of 3 cute kids. I am proud to be who I am and I am proud of the way I am. I am alive because I have a lot to live for. I have many dreams that I wish to reach for and I have many journeys to make. My life is like a soap opera, and you are the audience.

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