Getting Older

You Know You’re Getting Old When …

Some say my memory’s failing. But I know that just can’t be,
When I look in a mirror I always know that’s me.

-“25 Years Ago Today…” is your favorite part of the paper.
-A sexy babe catches your fancy and your pacemaker opens the garage door.
-All you want for your birthday is to not be reminded of your age.
-Almost everything hurts, and what doesn’t hurt, doesn’t work.
-At the breakfast table you hear snap, crackle, pop and you’re not eating cereal.
-Dialing long-distance wears you out.
-Everything either dries up or leaks.
-Everything hurts, and what doesn’t hurt – doesn’t work.
-“Getting a little action” means you don’t need to take any fiber today.
-“Getting lucky” means you find your car in the parking lot.
-Going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.
-Happy hour is a nap.
-It takes longer to rest than to get tired.
-It takes twice as long – to look half as good.
-It takes two tries to get up from the couch.
-The girls at the office start confiding in you.
-The pharmacist has become your new best friend.
-The twinkle in your eye is merely a reflection from the sun on your bifocals.
-“Tying one on” means fastening your MedicAlert bracelet.
-Work is a lot less fun … and fun a lot more work.
-You and your teeth don’t sleep together.
-You burn the midnight oil around 9:00 P.M.
-You choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy.
-You don’t care where your spouse goes, just so you don’t have to go along.
-You don’t need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.
-You finally get your head together and your body starts falling apart.
-You get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.
-You get winded playing games on the computer.
-You give up all your bad habits and still don’t feel good.
-You have a choice of two temptations … You choose the one that will get you home earlier.
-You have more patience, but it is actually that you just don’t care anymore.
-You look for your glasses for half an hour and they were on your head the whole time.
-You realize that caution is the only thing you care to exercise.
-You say something to your kids that your mother said to you and you always hated it.
-You sink your teeth into a steak – and they stay there.
-You sit in a rocking chair and can’t get it going.
-You step off a curb and look down one more time to make sure the street is still there.
-You stoop to tie your shoes and wonder what else you can do while you’re down there.
-You stop buying green bananas.
-You stop growing at both ends and begin to grow in the middle. You try to straighten out the wrinkles in your socks and discover you aren’t wearing any.
-You wake up looking like your driver’s license picture.
-You wake up with that morning-after feeling, and you didn’t do anything the night before.
-You wonder how you could be over the hill when you don’t even remember being on top of it.
-You write post-it notes with your kids’ names on them.
-Your address book has mostly names that start with Dr.
-Your back goes out more often than you do.
-Your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you’re barefoot.
-Your idea of a night out is sitting on the patio.
-Your idea of weight lifting is standing up.
-Your joints are more accurate than the National Weather Service.
-Your knees buckle, but your belt won’t.
-Your memory is shorter and your complaining lasts longer.
-Your secrets are safe with your friends. They they can’t remember them either.
-Your sweetie says, “Let’s go upstairs and make love,” and you answer, “Honey, pick one … I can’t do both!”
-Your wife gives up fooling around for Lent and you don’t realize it until the 4th of July.
-You’re cautioned to slow down by your doctor instead of by the police.
-You’re on vacation and your energy runs out before your money does.
-You’re sitting in a rocker and you can’t get it started.

SOME GREAT THINGS ABOUT GETTING OLDER

* Finally you can eat dinner at 4:00
* Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.
* Kidnappers are not very interested in you – unless you are filthy rich.
* It’s harder for sexual harassment charges to stick (but don’t mind doing it)
* If you’ve never smoked, you can start now and it won’t have time to hurt you.
* People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.
* Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can’t remember them either.
* Your supply of brain cells is finally down to a manageable size.
* Your eyes won’t get much worse.
* Things you buy now won’t wear out.
* No one expects you to run into a burning building.
* There’s nothing left to learn the hard way.
* Your joints are more accurate than the National Weather Service.
* In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.

Beng

Beng Hafner is my name. Well, most of you know that already. I am a mother of 3 and a granny of 3 cute kids. I am proud to be who I am and I am proud of the way I am. I am alive because I have a lot to live for. I have many dreams that I wish to reach for and I have many journeys to make. My life is like a soap opera, and you are the audience.

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27 Responses

  1. ting says:

    Should I be happy or should I be sad Mutti? I’m glad though that there are postive things about growing old..like I don’t need to walk anymore. I’ll just maneuver my wheel chair..waaaa!!!

  2. karina says:

    “I wanna make you smile whenever you’re sad
    Carry you around when your arthritis is bad
    All I wanna do is grow old with you….” :shy:

  3. Lukaret says:

    Mutti dear,

    I would say you should be happy 🙂 you’re not old as yours truly yet. Di vah?

  4. Lukaret says:

    Hello Karina,

    How sweet :hug:

  5. KnOizKi says:

    “* If you’ve never smoked, you can start now and it won’t have time to hurt you.”

    Buti na lang nag smoke ako when I was 19. Older na rin yun diba? I can relate to some of the “signs” maybe I’ll see these signs when I finally turn 40, they say Life starts at that age.

    As we grow older, I feel that LIFE is the best education you can get.

  6. foxyboksie says:

    Going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of your face. nyehehehe… hindi pa naman…:thinking:

    :heartbeat:

  7. thess says:

    -Almost everything hurts, and what doesn’t hurt, doesn’t work.
    and this is…..? :-D…yun ba yun?
    -The twinkle in your eye is merely a reflection from the sun on your bifocals. oh this is sad :crying:

    kaya let’s enjoy life na lang at its fullest while we can..and that means NOW, not later..
    oh tara, bakasyon na tayo sa caribbean :plane:

  8. amy says:

    hello Beng, thank you for passing by my site. thank you rin sa compliments sa :baby:baby ko:kitty: I love your page. I also like this blog, nakaka-relate. Anyways, ingat.
    Shoutz from Canada. :plane:

  9. Lukaret says:

    Knoiz, korek ka life begins at 40 talaga. Bakit ganun? Hmmm, pag-usapan natin ulit ang topic na ito when you reach that age :yes:

  10. Lukaret says:

    Boks,

    Paano yan eh kahit siguro ako bra-less later wa epek pa rin yan dahil…gapasas lang po 😀

  11. Lukaret says:

    Thess,

    Sa mga kikay na katulad ko kunyari…ay isa ito sa mangyayari later: “It takes twice as long – to look half as good.”

    Join ako sa yo…halika sabay tayong mag enjoy…saan ba :cloud9:

  12. Lukaret says:

    Amy hello,

    Thanks a lot at ingat ka rin diyan 🙂

  13. jing says:

    i made a checklist of these, heehee 50 percent of the symptoms i have :hissy:

    lalo na yung going upstairs :duh: sus kelangan exercise:running:

  14. thess says:

    oist serious ako..pag usapan natin ng masinsinan..gusto ko tayong 2 lang..kahit man lang sa spain tayo magbabad for a week or two, sa bitch..este beach..what say you? MAYBE di ba? :hyper:

  15. missP says:

    -Your knees buckle, but your belt won’t.

    :hissy: how true, how true! grabeee, this check list confirmed my fears, :gasp: TUMATANDA NA TALAGA (TAYO).. aba, siyempers ayoko naman solohin ang katandaan, :beee:

    join din ako, makikisabay sa pag eenjoy niyo :hyper:

  16. ting says:

    ‘miss you! ‘wala lang.

  17. thess says:

    re: tagboard ..dapat sa mga spammers, sagasaan eh! :motorbike: :drunk:

    Ola, muy bonita bonggadera, kumustasakalabasa na ba?

  18. Lukaret says:

    Mutti,

    Miss you too :yes:. Maraming-maraming salamat sa pagdalaw at pag-alala sa akin :shy:. I am so very busy this time, kaalis lang ng binata ko may darating na namang bisita this weekend and they will be staying for a week. I’m going to held a party on Saturday…halika lipad :plane: na.

  19. Lukaret says:

    Thess darling,

    Kumusta ang Mutya Ng Dordrecht? Hoy halika dito sa Sabado may party ako :bday:

    Either mag :plane: ka or mag :motorbike: or ganito mag cadila :running: kad. Miss youuu :hug:

  20. thess says:

    ang alila kamo sa dordrecht :roll:..enjoy your sat. parteeh! (sino may bday? ) salamat sa invite, ako naman ay mag aalaga ng 3 matanda sa sunday kaya preparation ko saturday, :duh: )mag re reunion sina dil at 2 kapatid nito, tapos isang cousin ni hans..so puro sila lalaki (kasama pa si charlie) ako lang bebot (boriiiiiiiinng) at taga kuha ng fictyurs…send me a piece of cake?

    mit na mit na kita!! :hug: (pautang? :mischievous::-D )

  21. missP says:

    :hissy:, di ako invited sa saturday, 🙁 ! sana :rainy: jan sa inyo… ng kasiyahan! :hyper: buwahahahaha.

    madame, kumusta?

  22. bing says:

    :thinking: inevitable talaga ang pagiging old, ‘no? but the good news is there are SOME GREAT THINGS ABOUT GETTING OLDER. i wrote an entry, too, about getting older titled INEVITABLE – a result of being a witness to old fellas trying to live life… sad fact but true.

  23. Lukaret says:

    Inday missP,

    lumampas na yon miss fra. ‘wawang bata nakaligtaang imbitahin…o sige safukin mo na si tita lukring :duh: tutuhanan yang sinabi mo ha? i’ll mark your word dahil tatawagan talaga kita next time :yes:

  24. Lukaret says:

    miss sharon cubeta,

    kumusta na ang reunion ng mga binata? di the only :rose: among the thorns ka pala sa party nila?

    kaalis lang po ng aking mga bisita. fagod na fagod ako ngayon dahil 3 days kaming out…bale ako ang kanilang guide kaya paa ko ay masakit sa kalalakad :crying:

    kumusta ba diyan?

  25. Lukaret says:

    bing hello,

    how true, how true…it is indeed inevitable. pero talagang ganyan kaya dapat nating tanggapin ng maluwag sa dibdib. :hissy: :crying:

    greetings

  26. thess says:

    pakner…hindi ako nakasama dahil sa dami ng work (extras) pero ok na rin, kasi pagod na din ako…
    relax ka naman at tayo ay maguusap ulit, soon :iloveu:

    btw, tag ulan na at malamig (parang may bago ano? 🙄 )..greetings to G and kiddies, tc!

  27. myepinoy says:

    Hello. Bumibisita lang. Napatambay, nagbasa at nakigulo.

    Dadag: Tumatanda ka na kapag alam mo pa ang salitang disco, kapag all-time favorite mo ay Eagles or Beatles. Kapag alam mo at na mi-miss mo ang choknut, at lagi mong naalala kung magkano ang baon mo noong araw.

    Maganda site mo, bago design.

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