There are no adequate words to express the horror caused by the powerful tsunami that hit several Asian nations last Sunday, Dec. 26, 2004. We are shocked and saddened by the horrible events and want to extend our deepest sympathies to the families and friends of the victims.

“In this dark hour we grieve with them in their loss.”

Eine einundzwanzig jähriges Mädchen kam heute vor einundzwanzigjahren nach Deutschland. Mittlerweile ist Sie 42 Jahre alt geworden. Genau betrachtet hat sie bereits die hälfte ihres Lebens hier verbracht. 21 ist gewiss nur eine Zahl, ein symbol, klein und für manche Menschen vielleicht ohne Bedeutung.

Innerhalb diese Zeit habe ich viele Erfahrungen gesammelt, vieles erlebt und von allen dingen habe ich gelernt zu kämpfen. Das Leben war nicht immer einfach für mich gewesen. Es gab Zeiten wo ich nur noch aufgeben wollte. Ich war zu Feige, zu ängstlich und hatte nicht den Mut gehabt mein Schicksal selbst an die Hand zu nehmen. Lange habe ich in den Schlaf zustand gelebt weil ich dachte das Leben ist so, oder vielleicht habe ich auch nur versucht die unangenehme Dinge zu ignorieren. Tief in meinem inneren war ich unruhig und unzufrieden und irgendwann verwandelte ich mich zu ein Rebell. Leid und Schmerz adieu, so will ich nicht mehr Leben.

Manche Leute sagten mir ich habe viel zu lange gewartet daher auch
viel Zeit verloren. Ich sehe es anders. Ich habe eben Zeit gebraucht gehabt zu entwickeln. Eben wie ein cocoon.

1997 entschluss ich mich mein ganzes Leben zu verändern. Mein Schicksal führe ich nun selbst und nicht mehr umgekehrt. Ich habe mein Selbstbewusst und Selbstvertrauen wieder erlangen. Manchmal denke ich, hätte ich das früher gemacht wäre vielleicht mein Leben anders.

Einundzwanzig jahren…volle Spannung, begleitet von Heiterkeit und Traurigkeit, Erfolg und Fehltritt. Das Leben ist genau wie ein Achterbahn, es geht mal auf und mal ab und drei looping noch dazu.

Ich bin nun älter geworden aber reifer im Verstand und stärker. Die Zeit hat mich verändert. Nicht nur mein aussehen sondern auch mein lebens-und-persönliche Einstellungen.

O Tannenbaum (O Christmas Tree)! My husband and I were arguing if we’ll buy a real christmas tree (real fir tree) this year or use the artificial one I bought last year. I told him to decide for himself para hindi na hahaba ang diskusyon. So ayon, umalis kaagad siya para maghanap. After almost two hours, he arrived home empty handed. Puro daw pangit and some are: crooked – like the glöckner of Notre Dame (Hunchback of Notre Dame), tapos very thin daw ang twigs – siguro kasing payat ni Twiggy at super expensive pa kaya hindi na lang siya bumili. Okey then we both agreed to use the artificial tree na lang para tipid.

Traditionally, the Christmas tree is presented prior to the evening feast. The tree has a mysterious magic for the children because they are not allowed to see it until Christmas Eve. When the children are occupied with another room usually by their father, mother brings out the Christmas tree and decorates it with apples, candy, buts, cookies, cars, trains, angles, tinsel, family treasures and candles or light. The presents are placed under the tree. When all is ready, bell is rung as a signal for the children to enter the “Christmas Room”. Children sing carol, listen to Christmas story and open their gifts under the tree.

We used to follow the tradition of presenting the tree on Christmas eve before. For a change, I decided to make it different this time
dahil over excited na si KC na mag decorate. So I went to the basement para kuhain ang naging controversial na Christmas tree. Before we assembled it nagkandarapa muna akong maghanap ng mapapatungan. I have to consider we have a small boy who loves to pick on the decors and a kitten who is fond to climb everywhere. I have to place the tree on a high elevated area. I finally found one from my husband’s office pero ng ipinatong ko ito muntik ng mabakli ang dulo dahil it touched the ceiling. I had no other choice than to assemble it on the floor. Nayon kong ano-ano na ang inilagay kong halang para hindi makalapit ang pusa. But the kitten is more tricky than me, so wala din akong laban. Hinahabol ko na lang siya ng walis kapag siya ay lumalapit sa Christmas tree.

I went to the city yesterday para tapusin ang pamimili ng mga regalo. Akala ko dahil working day wala gaanong tao…what a shock, almost one hour din akong nag-ikot para lang makahanap ng parking space. Kahit saan ako pumunta puro siksikan. Kaya I headed home right away matapos kong bilhin lahat ang mga kailangan ko. Well, kahit papaano…I enjoyed being with the crowd. Walking through the shopping malls and along the street, it’s exciting to see people hustling in all directions. Each one of them carrying a shopping bag containing presents for their loveones. It awakens my childish feeling again.

So much for now blog dahil kailangan ko pang magluto ng aming lunch. Da da!

Hello earth I’m back! I’m very sorry talaga na nawala ako for a couple of days. I was not expecting to encounter several errors after I upgraded my blog. May mga plugins kasi na hindi compatible to the latest version like wp-grins and some other stuff. I did not overwrite the files which I modified earlier in the hope I could keep it’s former functions. Well, I was mistaken. I received many error warnings after running several test and my template was awfully messed up too. Went to WP forum to ask for assistance but they were not able to give me a helpful hint. Therefore I decided to start fixing it myself. Mabuti na lang kahit papaano na solved ko rin ang mga problema. I’ll be more careful next time if ever I’m going to upgrade again. Curiousity kills a rat! Hehehe, the rat is still alive pero muntik ng mabaliw ng tuluyan dahil sa konsumi.

Oh my I need some rest. I had little sleep the other night dahil hindi ko talaga ito tinigilan hanggat hindi ko natapos lahat. My new friend Mommy Ting Aling and Knoizki has given me the drive to work til I drop dead hinanap na kasi nila ako eh kaya ako nagmadali. Maraming salamat sa inyong dalawa, I miss you guys.

My site look messy at the moment most specially to those who are using IE browser. I have updated my blog to a newer version and this is now the result. I need time to locate the error trigger…yikes! Honestly, I regret I updated.

Hey self, nagger na nga ba ako lately? My hubby told me that. Kong tutuo man, sino ba ang hindi maging ganyan. Of course I have to keep on telling them what to do because they don’t know how to follow simple instruction. Masama bang sabihin na iligpit ang kanilang kalat? Or kailangang gumamit ng plato when they eat bread para walang mahulog na crumbs sa sahig? I just can’t stand dirt and most of all, I am not a maid na tega sunod ng kanilang dumi. Katatapos ko lang maglinis…makalat at madumi na naman. It seems like they don’t appreciate my effort. Buti sana kong maliit lang ang bahay na isang ikot ko lang tapos na agad. Nakakaloka!

Bilhan ko kaya sila ng tig-iisang manok as christmas present para may tega tuka ng kanilang ikinakalat na crumbs doon sa sahig. I can save my energy and electricity that way. Wala, hindi na yata matuto itong mga kasama ko sa bahay. Pagkakamali ko rin dahil wala akong sinasabi dati, ngayon pa lang ako magsimulang mag reklamo. Very elastic pa kasi ang patience ko noon kaya no comment lang ako.

Dapat pala sinabi ko na kaagad noon kong ano ang ayaw ko. Huli na ang lahat para matuto ang asawa ko at saka mahirap turuan ang mga taong matalino dahil sasagutin ka lang na alam na nila yon.

“Kaya Beng, magtiis ka!”